No Country for Old Phlegm

I really need to write.  Something.  Anything.  Well, anything besides this blog post.  Although, this post IS comprised of words and punctuation.  Most of it even correct.  So this might just count, after all.

Or maybe not.

I do not want to put into words what many others are already figuring out.  This year has not started on a good foot.  Maybe for a few it has, and to those I say, “Well, good for you!”  There is no sarcasm in that.  I swear.  Nothing but the best possible sincerity.  Plus a little…

Fine.  I’m being sarcastic.  I probably am really happy for those that have welcomed a better year so far.  I just have to get past my own hardships, and then I can be truly sincere in my lack of sarcasm.  I am really tired of all this tongue in cheekiness.  I want to be able to say congratulations without that bitter aftertaste with which I’ve become well acquainted.  But no luck so far.  I will let you know when that changes.  Or you might be able to tell for yourself.  In which case, you can tell me when it changes.

Financially, life is kicking my ass.  I’m trying to buckle down and not get sidetracked by doubts and fears.  It’s about as easy as ignoring a screaming goat, but without that funny.  I never expected to rake in big bucks with the writing, so that’s not an issue.  But stressing over how to pay the bills is interfering with my creativity.  As much as I want to write, the words aren’t coming. 

So I turned to crafting.  But I’m outta practice there, too.  At Christmas, I made stockings.  They all sold, but the time I spent making them was far greater than the asking price.  I’ve come up with a few other ideas, but nothing is really clicking.  So now I’ve decided to go with what I ‘know’ I’m good at.  No matter how insecure I can be about my writing and crafting skills, the one thing I am not insecure about is my skills in custom picture framing.  We’ll see where this gets me. 

I don’t have to get rich.  I’m not that greedy.  I just want to pay my bills, and take care of my family.  I have ferrets in need of vet care that I can’t afford now, thanks to last year’s misfortunes.  But I’m not looking for handouts.  I am perfectly willing to work for it.  I just need to figure out what it is that I can offer, that people will really want. 

There’s hope on the job front, as well.  More hours, and the potential to earn commissions.  That could help, IF I can get some new clients through the doors.  I’ve seen the glimmer of a possible future there, and for a while I was worried that wouldn’t be the case. 

This year has not started off well, but I’m not throwing in the towel just yet. 

 

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